Europe To Sue Penn State: Wants "Zombie Nation" Back

University Park, PA: It has become a weekly tradition on Autumn Saturdays in Penn State's Beaver Stadium. Fans watch anxiously as the opposing quarterback drops back, looks to pass, and gets thrown to the turf for a sack. The Nittany Lions faithful know the drill. It's time to cue the music. Almost immedietly over 107,000 elated fans jump in unison as the techno hit "Zombie Nation" wails from the stadium jumbotron. However, if Goran Mippipopoulos and the rest of the European continent have their way the fans at Beaver Stadium won't be celebrating much longer.

In a class action lawsuit scheduled to be filed in a London district court on Monday, Mippipopoulos and some 731 million Europeans will sue Penn State University in an attempt to retain the exclusive rights to the song "Zombie Nation." If successful, "Zombie Nation" will join David Beckham as the second European import to defect from the United States in a matter of weeks. Citing "wreckless and immoral usage" Mippipopoulos, President of the organization Techno For A More Progressive Europe or TFAMPE, intends to question the university's moral objective for playing the song in hopes of returning the tune "back to where it rightfully belongs."

Written by German hit-machine Kernkraft 400 in the Spring of 1999, "Zombie Nation" was realized after group member Emanuel Guenther sought a way to put into song the emotions felt when simultaneously dancing and watching Braveheart. Soon after, the epic hit "Zombie Nation" was born. "We're angered. Techno is not just a form of music to Europeans, it is our lifeblood. The manner in which Penn State University has chosen to use the song is not only disrespectful, it is libelous. You don't hear Europeans running around singing "The Star Spangled Banner" after a goal. How these Americans think they have a right to use one of our national anthems in any way they choose is beyond comprehension" stated a clearly agitated Mippipopoulos.

Across the Atlantic however there seems to be little concern for the upcoming suit. When reached for comment Penn State University President Graham Spanier gave no indication that the university would be intimidated by those residing on the European continent when adding, "Not only is their claim ludicrous, we feel it really sets a poor example to the rest of the world. "Zombie Nation" is now and forever will be the worlds song. I don't recall the Baha Men taking such a selfish approach with "Who Let The Dogs Out" and obviously we've all benefitted from that. Heck, we gave Iraq democracy and they didn't even ask for it. Yet TFAMPE thinks it's fair to keep such a timeless piece of techno exclusively to themselves simply because it was written within their borders, well then they have to be out of their minds. We look forward to undressing the frivoloty of this lawsuit in court and ultimately to keeping the harmonies of "Zombie Nation" free-flowing in Beaver Stadium. "

In collegiate athletics schools everywhere have their traditions and Penn State University is no exception. In Madison Wisconsin fans like to "Jump Around." In Columbus, you can find Ohio State Buckeye fans rocking and rolling to The McCoys classic hit "Hang On Sloopy." But what the future holds for "Zombie Nation" in PSU's Beaver Stadium remains to be seen. The case is expected to be set for trial sometime during the Summer of 2009.